Cut out bloat

I can not claim to know the human body, or bodies that are not mine. My body is the only specimen that I have worked on. My stomach is the only one that I know. I have no facts or stats or graphs. All I know is that 3 years ago my body hit rock bottom and I have been living like a slave to my intestines and gut ever since.
3 years ago I was in my final year of studies, working my ass off, quite literally sweating the fat off my body. 3 years ago I met a person that I am now connected to in more ways than I knew one could ever be. 3 years ago I started taking the pill. 3 years ago I began to notice, in my body, strange food intolerances,  weight loss and strange skin changes
Gluten: a substance found in all of my absolute favourite things; cakes, pizzas, pasta, oats, bread, chocolate, sausage and all of the amazing things at any bakery. I slowly began to notice that the things that I ate, that I had been eating my whole life, were now, starting to cause my stomach to swell, bloat and cramp. I would eat some Malva pudding with Marcel’s English toffee ice- cream ( favourite meal in the world) and slowly I would feel my stomach growing. I would look down and I would see myself 6 months preggies. It was still early days in my relationship so I was still shy and cute in my nudity. Having a swollen gluten belly was not easy. And the wind. Oh wow. The wind.
Soon my gluten intolerance became a gluten and lactose intolerance and then a gluten, lactose and sugar intolerance.
3 years of a swelling stomach, runny nose, sneezing, headaches and itchy eyes. I don’t know how this guy managed to fall in love with me. I was a walking talking fart and snot machine. And to make things worse, I was absolutely convinced that my allergies were as a result of him, his shampoo, his deodorant, his cream, his shaved stubble, his sun block, his this, his that, his everything. And he tolerated it all. He changed shampoo, soap, deodorant. It was madness. And still I was a noisy mess of a woman.
Now after 3 months of no contraceptive pill, 3 years of no gluten, no lactose, no sugar, and about 2 years of no GMO. I am finally at a point where I can eat almost anything that I want and know that my farts will be lady-like rather than the deathly situation that I have been putting everyone around me through.
I was that person who ruined the air in a night club. eating supper and then going out was a nightmare. Dancing, along with belly patting or beating , lying in bed with my bum in the air, lying with my knees pulled up to my chin, were all very good methods for me to relieve the bloating and get rid of the painful air fast. I was that person. I am now a champion at farting with no shame on my face. My poor mother things that I am savage.
My study has proven, by process of elimination, that my body, filled with false hormones from the pill, foreign hormones and antibiotics from genetically modified foods and stress, resulted in a complete break down of strength, emotional stability, confidence and the natural ability to function for particular parts of my body, ie, stomach, intestines, bowls and sinuses.
Hi, my name is Thola and I am trying to live with more body-health awareness than the government and pharmaceutical companies award me. .

I choose health.

I choose me.


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